Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Anthony "Spice" Adams Raps About Ribs

Posted By on Wed, Jul 31, 2013 at 8:39 PM

Retired NFL defensive tackle Anthony "Spice" Adams parodies Tyga's "Rack City" with delicious results.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

They Aren't Chew Toys But Dogs Love Them!

Posted By on Tue, Jul 30, 2013 at 1:55 PM

Kudos to Channel 5 reporter Jason Miles for showing so much restraint with this Tweet...

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Which directed followers to this headline.

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Monday, July 29, 2013

Channel-5 Tweets

Posted By on Mon, Jul 29, 2013 at 10:14 PM

Submitted without comment.

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Chuck & Barack: An Extraordinary Correspondence

Posted By on Mon, Jul 29, 2013 at 9:49 PM

By now everyone has surely seen the extraordinary postcard 3rd-District Congressman Chuck Fleischmann created for the benefit of President Barack Obama. But have you seen the President's extraordinary response?

From Chuck:

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From Barack:

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Saturday, July 27, 2013

Looking for a Kiss? Here are 70 of Them.

Posted By on Sat, Jul 27, 2013 at 2:46 PM

Smooooooooooch!
  • Smooooooooooch!

We'll leave it to the art bloggers over at Exhibit M to talk about process and meaning, and all that. But "Return to Sender," a series by Memphis photographer Tommy Kha, showing the artist remaining passive while being kissed by various friends, lovers, and strangers is too great not to share.

Kha says the series is ongoing and he hopes to eventually collect somewhere in the neighborhood of 200 images. So pucker up, folks!

Friday, July 26, 2013

Arkansas Explained in One Headline

Posted By on Fri, Jul 26, 2013 at 3:39 PM

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On a more serious note, fresh water swimmers should know that they risk a 1 in 33-million chance of being attacked by this unkillable nightmare bug.

Area Law Firm Airs an Alarmingly Straightforward Commercial

Posted By on Fri, Jul 26, 2013 at 1:11 PM

These are what accidents look like
  • These are what accidents look like
Memphis — In a shocking turn of events, local law firm Fintress and Associates has produced a television ad so alarmingly straightforward some critics have demanded that it be removed from late night television.

Using no gimmicks, the 30-second spot features a single attorney seated at his desk, listing his merits and requesting your business.

Viewer Ray Sipsa noted, “They didn’t have no dogs or rabbits. There weren’t no fancy computer cartoons or magic tricks. Hell, they didn’t even spell something out with the phone number. It just ain’t fittin.”

Retired beauty pageant judge Mary Gavelbanger has taken her concerns to the corner of Poplar and Highland where she waves a sign asking, “How am I supposed to trust an attorney who doesn’t share a touching anecdote about his daughter or pet?"

"And just what kind of name is Dean Fintress?" Gavelbanger asks. "It doesn’t even rhyme with anything. How can you be a good attorney without dope beats or a catchy tune?"

There's at least one area media consultant who doesn't think this trend will catch on.

"These ads are supposed to be aimed at people who've experienced a personal injury," says Vera Blunt of B.S. Business Solutions. "They expect more. And, in my humble opinion, they deserve more."

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Miley on Molly

Posted By on Thu, Jul 25, 2013 at 11:59 PM

Readers, if you're anything like me you wake up in the middle of the night screaming things like, "WHAT DO MILEY CYRUS' LYRICS MEAN?!?!?!"

What is your riddle, Sphinx!?!?!!
  • What is the answer to your riddle, Sphinx!?!?!!


Lucky for us the journalists at the UK's Daily Mail aren't afraid to ask the hard questions the world is begging to have answered. Questions like, "In your song We Can't Stop, when you sing about dancing with Molly, are you like really singing about dancing on, you know...molly?" Her response...YES!

That's right readers. Drugs.

DID YOUR 5TH GRADE OATH MEAN NOTHING TO YOU MILEY!?!?!?!?!
  • DID YOUR 5TH GRADE OATH MEAN NOTHING TO YOU MILEY!?!?!?!?!

But hey, we all make mistakes. Maybe one drug reference in a popular pop song isn't that bad, I mean it's not like there's two references-OH MY GOD THERE"S TWO!!!!

"Everyone in line in the bathroom. Trying to get a line in the bathroom."
-Miley Cyrus, the Tennessee Twerker

Yeah, that "line" she's singing about isn't an ordinary line. No readers, I wish it were that innocent. The "line" in question is a reference to the drug COCAINE!!!! A drug that is apparently (upon my further investigation) a "hell of a drug"!!!

Its true... -Rick James (RIP)-
  • "It's true..." -Rick James (RIP)-

None of this should come as a surprise, I suppose. Miley is a former star of a TV kids show. Children's television has always made subtle references to drugs like molly. The clip below isn't even all that subtle.

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Have Businesses Commercialized Tennessee's Tax Holiday?

Posted By on Thu, Jul 25, 2013 at 7:34 AM

Gadsden Flagg
  • Gadsden Flagg
Millington, TN— The statewide Sales Tax Holiday is celebrated by millions, but one group of concerned Tennesseans thinks some businesses went too far when they started putting out decorations in June.

"You can imagine my shock," says Gadsden Flagg, the co-President and founder of Common Cents, a not-for-profit organization that, according to the group's website, "is dedicated to defending the true meaning of Tennessee's Tax Holiday."

"I'd just stopped in at my neighborhood pharmacy to pick up a Garfield Father's Day card for my lasagna-loving dad and there was this entire aisle devoted to nothing but pens, and notebooks, and stuff like that," Flagg says, recalling the moment when he stopped standing on the sidelines and became an activist.

"I saw a sweet protractor-and-compass set, and a couple of different kinds of pencil sharpeners. You name it, they had it on display. And I was like, 'This is so not right."

"We don't want to spoil anybody's fun," says Flagg's partner Houston Leavey. "We only want to remind people that our Tax Holiday isn't about how big your tree is or how hammered you're gonna get with all your fishing buddies. It's about saving 10-or-15 cents on a really nice three-ring binder. It's about being able to buy a year's worth of Scotch tape at one time. And it's all tax free so you don't have to worry about whose college tuition you might be subsidizing.

"All we've ever wanted is for people to stop and think about the real reasons why we shop for back-to-school supplies before going back to school," Leavey says.

Jed Blisterwig, who owns and operates Jed’s Clamp-It on Madison Ave, says his business triples during the holiday weekend even though nothing he carries is tax exempt.

"People are already out shopping and figure they might as well stop in for some clamps," says Blisterwig, who claims he's never even heard of Tax Holiday decorations.

"I've got no idea what you're talking about, to be honest," he says.

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Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Forget the Royal Baby, Walgreens Helps You Zumba Like a King

Posted By on Wed, Jul 24, 2013 at 2:55 PM

If you don't know already, the Walgreens in downtown Memphis is unlike any other Walgreens in the world. Here's the most recent evidence.

For the hunka-hunka sweaty love in your life
  • For the hunka-hunka sweaty love in your life

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Amanda Bynes to run for Memphis Mayor?

Posted By on Wed, Jul 24, 2013 at 1:59 PM

Memphis— Is child star/outsider weapons designer Amanda Bynes considering a run for the Memphis Mayor's office?

When asked to comment on a possible Bynes platform, an area politico who asked not to be named suggested that she might surround Mud Island with sharks and turn it into a prison for drug offenders.

"She said she'd get rid of all the rats," our source claims.

"Then she screamed at me and threw gas on what looked like a dog."

Amanda Bynes with Prince Mongo. Or Prince Mongo with Amanda Bynes. We're really not sure anymore.
  • Amanda Bynes with Prince Mongo. Or Prince Mongo with Amanda Bynes. We're really not sure anymore.

Monday, July 22, 2013

A Mural of Dr. King Yelling at a College Graduate

Posted By on Mon, Jul 22, 2013 at 3:54 PM

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Self-Tucker Architects have been giving the Greenlaw Community Center a nifty facelift. The new entry canopy is striking, and the landscaping is noticeably improved.

The murals are especially provocative, forcing viewers to ask hard questions like, why in the world is Dr. King yelling at a newly- minted graduate? And, more importantly, what do you think he might be saying?

For the love of God and all thats holy, get out of Memphis!
  • "For the love of God and all that's holy, get out of Memphis!"

Friday, July 19, 2013

Don Sundquist Pets a Bunny: An adorable picture from the "Memphis Flyer" archives

Posted By on Fri, Jul 19, 2013 at 9:07 AM

Former Governor Don Sundquist and a Bunny
  • Former Governor Don Sundquist and a Bunny
Once in a while Fly on the Wall likes to dig back into the Memphis Flyer archives in order to, you know, fill some space when we've got not much else to show for ourselves. Like this week, for example, while I'm on vacation.

In this first installment of "From the Morgue," I'd like to share this photo of former Governor Don Sundquist holding a bunny, and a true story from the Memphis Flyer newsroom.

There was a time during Sundquist's Governorship when Flyer writers and editors used this photograph so often that the art director, believing we should back off the bunny stuff and mix things up a little more, either hid or destroyed the original. Thankfully Governor Don and his furry little buddy made it onto the internet just in time to stave off oblivion.

There's no real point in showing you this photo of former Governor Don Sunquist with a bunny. But you've got to admit, as "former governor photos" go, it's pretty awesome.

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

T-Model Ford and R.L. Burnside the Comic Book

Posted By on Tue, Jul 16, 2013 at 9:33 PM

R.L. Burnside gives T-Model Ford some advice.
  • R.L. Burnside gives T-Model Ford some advice.
When I was a stringer for Details way back at the turn-of-the-century the men's magazine sent artist Joe Sacco on tour with Fat Possum recording artists R.L. Burnside and T-Model Ford. Sacco, best known for drawing the award-winning graphic novel Palestine, documented life on the road with the hill country's finest and the Details comics were eventually collected in the Fat Possum Records book Darker Blues.

This blog post features Sacco's Fat Possum cartoons, and it seemed like something fans mourning the loss of blues artist T-Model Ford might want to check out.

Continue reading »

8-Lane 'Green Line' Through Overton Park Announced, Officials Hoping Everyone Will Just Go With It

Posted By on Tue, Jul 16, 2013 at 1:27 PM

Alan Thyme
  • Alan Thyme
MEMPHIS—With fingers crossed and bated breath, city officials today announced that construction will soon begin on “The Overton Park Green Line,” a multi-lane "thoroughfare" connecting I-40 Downtown to Sam Cooper Boulevard.

“The new Green Line is exactly what our community has been clamoring for,” said spokesman Alan Thyme, brazenly twirling his sinister moustache. “In fact,” he continued, “as part of the project, we’re sponsoring a new Urban Jungle exhibit at the Memphis Zoo,” referencing the intention to raze and pave Primate Canyon.

One area resident remarked that he was “excited that [his] neighborhood would finally be Green Line accessible,” unaware that he will be evicted and his multi-generation family home bulldozed to build a more efficient route for freight to pass through Memphis.

Implementation is expected to begin in early 2014, with an expected completion date of March 2065. An independent analysis by state engineers predicts that the sound of traffic passing by the acoustically live Levitt Shell could strip paint off of passing vehicles.

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