Friday, February 19, 2010
Name The City
Posted by Mary Cashiola on Fri, Feb 19, 2010 at 10:28 AM
The Metro Charter Commission is enlisting LaunchMemphis — and local citizens — to help it fulfill one of its most important responsibilities: figuring out what the new consolidated government would be called.
The commission hopes to set up a way to get citizen suggestions by next week and plans to keep the process open for two to three weeks.
Following the example of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt — a.k.a. Brangelina — I think we have to go with Memphishelby.
In all seriousness, there are statutory limitations on the name of the new government. It has to be either the Memphis Metropolitan government, Shelby Metropolitan government, Memphis Shelby Metropolitan government, or something the commission deems historically or geographically appropriate.
At a meeting last night, metro charter commission members acknowledged that the choice was limited, but said the naming contest would help build citizen awareness about the charter commission is and what they are doing.
But when you think about it, it's not that limited. There are all sorts of things we could go with.
There's Wolf River Metro. Or, better yet, the Wolf Metro.
If we became the Wolf Metro area, there's no way citizens could suffer from all those feelings of inadequacy they do as Memphians. We would be Wolfians. Plus, when Forbes publishes its their most miserable places, no one would know where Wolf was. But it would sound badass.
We could acknowledge the way the world is going — corporate citizens, anyone? — and, as a nod to it, choose something such as FedExia.
Gracelandland?
Shelvis? (Bianca Phillips gave me this one. Just for the record.)
Just think of all the rebranding possibilities.
Comments (40)
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What about No-Not-Nashville (the other one). We could drop the parenthesis and shorten the name to NNN, N cubed, or Triple N.
...of before anyone else thinks about it, recycle the old ABA name: the Tams. We could be the Tam Metropolitan area. We could refer to ourselves as Tamians or Tamites (too close to termites?). Just think- Tam International Airport, the Tam in May, the Tam Symphony and of course: “Here they are- your Tam Grizzlies!”
clearly overlooking the obvious:DELTANIA "where you'll never go thirsty again!"
mhr
愤 -- The city formerly known as Memphis.
Or, how about borrowing from the old cable access show:
Sinus City. (motto: We're nothing to sneeze at)
there's going to be a .nyc, a .paris, and a .berlin. What not .memphis? Then we can have rockridge.memphis, midtown.memphis, Nichopolis.memphis, Hadleyburg.memphis, Bluesville.memphis, etc.
We ought to abandon consolidation altogether and form a city-state. The school budget alone is large enough to support a small military. With all the taxes we pay, surely we could at least afford a tank or two, and maybe even some artillery.
Plus, SPQM would look really cool on all the manhole covers.
Seriously, think about this for a minute. Imagine phalanx divisions with Hamilton High School colors. We could take Nashville in a week, easy.
How about NEON CITY?????
Maybe a name that says no corrupt officials in this town.............
'Neon City' is pretty ironic, considering that when you cross the Mississippi on I-40, you are greeted by a large neon sign that for months ( if not longer) has proudly spelled out
'M E M P : S'
A week? Nastyville would fall faster than Baghdad! Talk about shock and awe baby! The years of pent up frustration with state level political games, coupled with the sheer masses of people that the newly formed city-state of "What Ever the Best Name is for our New Super Cool City-State" has available for military service we could truly be a force that few this side of the Marine Corps would dare to cross. Not to mention we have the "aerotropolis" thing going for us for air superiority, The Med for medical needs, and a plethora of body guards (from Herenton to Cash) that could form an elite Republican Guard force to direct the action.
I say let's do it. What's the worst that Nashville can do to us? Give us back the Titans?
'lil Detroit.
It has some of the same economic problems, and Fords have been big local players.
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