It's Thanksgiving week, and it's being reported that food banks around the country will be serving more Thanksgiving meals for the poor than ever before. This is not surprising. We're still reeling from the recent recession. Unemployment remains high. People continue to lose their homes to foreclosures, leading to instability in neighborhoods that were once thriving and decreasing tax revenues. National, state, and local government budgets are strained to the breaking point. Social services are being cut, and school tuitions are being raised.
Fortunately, happy times are about to return. Our country has been "taken back," put in the hands of responsible, straight-shooting adults who will deliver us from our economic malaise. Now that the Republicans have won Congress and gained a large majority of governorships and state legislatures, things will quickly improve, since, as we've now learned, Nancy Pelosi and President Obama were the cause of all our problems.
Once Republicans cut off unemployment benefits and extend tax cuts to the wealthy, the economy will rebound. That resultant $830 billion shortfall in tax revenues will actually help us reduce the deficit! Here's how it will work: The rich will use all the money that they don't pay in taxes to invest in businesses, which will hire unemployed people, and the money will trickle down in streams of gold to the grateful working class, which will then pay taxes to reduce the deficit. And here's the beautiful part: After Republicans raise the age of eligibility for Social Security to 70, all the non-wealthy folks will pay taxes for five more years. Deficit reduced! Sure, it's never worked before, but this time will be different. Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachman, John Boehner, and their Fox friends guarantee it.
And since Republicans refuse to confirm any federal judges who have been appointed by President Obama, we don't have to worry about "activism" from the bench. Plus, they're going to send all the immigrants back to Mexico or wherever they came from, which means lots more jobs for "real" Americans. Oh, the next two years are going to be glorious!
Post-election polls tell us that those who voted in the recent mid-terms skewed wealthy and older. No surprise. They were angry. As they should be. After all, they don't get a free turkey at Thanksgiving like all those other lucky bastards.
I'm writing this from the restroom facility at Big Hill Pond State Park in southern McNairy County. On Monday, I commandeered the building, which contains the men's and women's restrooms, some racks of pamphlets, and two vending machines. There's no one here right now, but I plan to stay as long as necessary to protest the fact that the state of Tennessee is run by oppressive know-nothings who wouldn't know small government — or freedom, for that matter — if it bit them on their considerable backsides ...