Guilty. Guilty of lying to the federal government. Guilty of obstruction of justice. Facing prison time. Finally. The big question now becomes, if they can do this to Martha Stewart, why can t they do it to George W. Bush, who from now on will be referred to on this page not as the Creature or the Liar, but the Expletive? Whatever Martha did or didn t do, I doubt it hurt that many people. And it certainly didn t cause any babies to have their heads blown off or more than 500 American soldiers to die, as is the case in the Iraq war the Expletive led us into based on his pack of lies. And while it would be great to see him tried, convicted, and sent to prison, I d be just as happy if the government just dropped a big dome on that ranch of his and let him exist there with his cronies forever and let em fret themselves into a stroke worrying about gay people getting married. We could lift the dome up every once in a while and show them a receipt for gasoline at a reasonable price and that would likely jolt them as well, since that would be taking money out of their back pockets. Maybe we could finally get a real independent commission to investigate what really happened regarding the attacks of 9/11, instead of a bunch of Expletive-appointed yes men who are just going to mess it up and can t even force the Expletive to tell us the truth about what he knew. One of his best lies so far was when he said that he watched the first World Trade Center attack live on the air, when, in fact, there was no footage of it as it happened. Of course, that could always just be because he is stupid and got it wrong, seeing as how he was so busy with his photo op at the Florida elementary school the morning it happened three weeks after his administration threatened to bomb the Taliban for not playing the game their way over an oil pipeline. Wonder why it is that he doesn t want to come clean about all that? And isn t it funny that a federal grand jury is trying to get the phone records from calls made from Air Force One from the week when CIA agent Valerie Plame was outed, not long after her husband Joseph Wilson was so critical of the Expletive and his administration? And isn t it odd that he told the media not to show photos of any caskets of fallen American soldiers in Iraq but used the image of a firefighter s casket from 9/11 in his very first re-election television campaign commercial? No, there s nothing illegal about that, but even those of you who support him must admit that s kind of a sick, twisted thing to do. If you don t, just ask most of the family members of those were killed that day. Oh, well. Maybe someday the truth will finally come out and the he Expletive will be living under a sealed dome on his Texas ranch, walking around in jeans that don t fit right and cowboy boots and puffing his little chest out as far as his little beady eyes can see, and he could lie, cheat, and steal from only those with him in the dome. I guess one can only hope. In the meantime, here s a brief look at some of what s going on around town this week. Tonight, I think it s a must that you go to the Admiralty Inn & Suites on Highway 51 North to see a dinner-theater production of Neil Simon s The Star-Spangled Girl. And then report back. Or you could go visit the Stax Museum of American Soul Music.