Sunday, December 28, 2014

The Howling Monkey Reads The Comics: 12-28-14

Posted By on Sun, Dec 28, 2014 at 7:42 PM

Alright, look. We do this live and record it live. So the production values are shoddy at best.  So just listen to this and laugh and laugh as we explain why the Sunday comics are funny. Allegedly.

The Howling Monkey Reads the Comics is a feature of The Howling Monkey blog. Joey Hack is a regular contributor to The Fly On The Wall blog and is a member of The Wiseguys improv troupe.

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Ohio Man Sells Elvis' Pubic Hair on Craigslist

Posted By on Tue, Dec 23, 2014 at 12:08 PM

Eeeeewwwwwwwwwwww! - CRAIGSLIST
  • Craigslist
  • Eeeeewwwwwwwwwwww!

Your Fly-Team has seen a lot of weird Elvis-related auctions and sales. This one, however, is a special kind of WTAF. So much so that it's being submitted without comment. 

From the listing:

All you Elvis collectors lookie here. I have a real pubic hair from Elvis Presley plucked by my ex-wife Billie Jean Flurt from Elvis crotch in 1965. I hate to part with it. But it can be yours for Christmas for $5000.00. Comes with letter of authenticity signed by Colonel Parker. I guarantee its real!

Sounds like a great XXX-mas gift for a special hardcore fan, if you smell what we're stepping in. 

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Twelve Memphis Days of Christmas

Posted By on Thu, Dec 18, 2014 at 5:10 PM

Your Fly Team has taken the season's most tedious carol and given it a Memphis twist. Please enjoy this very special sing-along karaoke rendition of The Twelve Memphis Days of Christmas. 

Made with a little help from The Wiseguys. 

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Merry Christmas: Elvis Hologram Duets with Iggy Azalea's Bottom.

Posted By on Tue, Dec 16, 2014 at 10:15 AM

It's supposed to be a hologram of Elvis, but it looks more like Aloha Johnny Cash. Also, Snowgirl Iggy poots.
  • It's supposed to be a hologram of Elvis, but it looks more like Aloha Johnny Cash. Also, Snowgirl Iggy poots.

In case you missed it, Elvis made an appearance in South Park’s 2014 Christmas extravaganza, sort of. The cartoon featured an animated version of an Elvis hologram singing “Holly Jolly Christmas” with Iggy Azalea’s flatulent bottom, decorated to look like a snowman. South Park’s Cartman, commentis on the performance like a video blogger. He's unimpressed.

Here's the clip.

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Monday, December 15, 2014

Sometimes Headlines Have More Than One Meaning

Posted By on Mon, Dec 15, 2014 at 2:17 PM

It all began innocently enough with a letter to Annie's Mailbox, an advice column by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar: "Dear Annie, I am a 14-year-old boy. I'm on the swim team, and I take tap dancing lessons."

And then this happened in the Commercial Appeal. 


Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Memphis TV Station Arrested For Allegedly Stabbing Other TV Station in Brawl Over Fancy Wig

Posted By on Tue, Dec 9, 2014 at 4:41 PM

Mug Shot
  • Mug Shot

Memphis TV station WMC, AKA Action News 5, was taken into police custody Tuesday after stabbing rival TV Station WREG, News Channel 3, with what police are describing as a "big fucking samurai sword."

Witnesses at the scene say Action News 5 was trying on a Kim Kardashian brand hairpiece valued at $39.95 when News Channel 3 snuck up behind the unsuspecting station and snatched the wig right off its head.

"Lord, you should have heard Channel 5 holler," said WKNO Channel 10. The public television station was enjoying margaritas and an order of guacamole fries on the patio at Cafe Olé when the fight broke out.

"It sounded like somebody was being murdered," WKNO said. "And then that samurai sword came out, and we thought somebody was going to be murdered."

WMC's neighbors greeted the news with mixed reactions.

"I kinda think WREG is a little bit jealous of WMC," says unlicensed massage therapist Carl Masutra who lives in a van that he parks behind a popular fast food restaurant on Union Ave. "And if somebody was trying to snatch their wig, I think they've got a right to stand their ground."

Brenda Dishwalla of Dishwalla Interiors says she's shocked by the behavior of both news stations.

"Which one is supposed to be 'on your side?'" Dishwalla asked. "Is it WMC 'on your side' or WREG 'on your side?' Because it doesn't sound to me like either of these stations is on my side. And who the hell goes around carrying a samurai sword?"

Channel 3 was taken to the hospital where it was treated for minor injuries. WMC was questioned and released on its own recognizance. Although graffiti was spotted near the scene, no gang involvement is currently suspected, and no formal charges have been brought against either station. 

96X Raps: Throwback X-radio station becomes throwback hip-hop station

Posted By on Tue, Dec 9, 2014 at 10:49 AM


RIP 96X; Long live Boomin96! 

Just when everybody was finally getting used to hearing that one James song we'd all happily forgotten years ago, WIVG-FM’s throwback X-radio format has been changed to a throwback hip-hop format. Thanks to Flinn Broadcasting for continuing to make our drive time radio experience like a scene from Walking Dead where one of the main characters runs into the reanimated version of somebody they dated back before the zombie apocalypse. 

With its devotion to 80's and 90's-era hip-hop Boomin96 is currently serving up all that East Coast/West Coast rivalry you've been missing since Notorious B.I.G. delivered his "Long Kiss Goodnight."

Plus Run-D.M.C.'s "Christmas in Hollis."

Sunday, December 7, 2014

The Howling Monkey Reads The Comics: 12-7-14

Posted By on Sun, Dec 7, 2014 at 11:03 AM

A giant box! Sleepless nights! A dancing turtle! Making fun of the Rolling Stones! All that and more on this episode of the Howling Monkey Reads The Comics!

The Howling Monkey Reads the Comics is a feature of The Howling Monkey blog. Joey Hack is a regular contributor to The Fly On The Wall blog and is a member of The Wiseguys improv troupe.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

His & Hers: Aaron James & Nancy Apple turn cultural flotsam into art

Posted By on Wed, Dec 3, 2014 at 1:40 PM


Some couples really complement one another. Take, for instance, Cadillac Cowgirl Nancy Apple,  a well-known Memphis songwriter and guitar picker, and her beau, Aaron James, who's a writer and an altogether different kind of  picker, with a keen eye for oddity and architectural treasure. Both Apple and James are avid thrift shoppers and experienced dumpster divers, with a taste for American kitsch, and an outsider artist's drive to transform lost objects into decorative and thought provoking constructions. The creative couple will show their work Thursday, Dec. 4th at Crosstown Arts in a one night only show appropriately titled His & Hers.

Unsurprisingly, Apple's cut-and-paste shrines are built around gutted guitars, fading fiddles, and other stringed instruments that have seen better days. I especially like this piece featuring decoupaged images of Johnny and June Carter Cash.  

Gentlest Heart by Nancy Apple
  • Gentlest Heart by Nancy Apple

James' assemblages are more confrontational,  commenting on consumerism, religion, and war. This one pretty much speaks for itself. 

  • Aaron James

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Atheists Launch Christmas Billboard Campaign

Posted By on Tue, Dec 2, 2014 at 10:35 PM


It’s December, that happy time of year when people get frothing mad about the nonexistent “War on Christmas.” In an unusual turn of events, the first salvo in this year’s skirmish appears to have been fired by American Atheists, a 40-year-old advocacy group that's hosting a national convention in Memphis this coming April. A billboard promoting the event pictures a little girl writing a letter to Santa: “All I want for Christmas is to skip church! I’m too old for fairy tales.”

This seems like as good an excuse as any to link a terrible movie about a jolly old elf locked in mortal combat with Satan. 

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