Internet

Friday, March 24, 2017

MAF Has a New Meaning: Memphis Ass Farm

Posted By on Fri, Mar 24, 2017 at 12:04 PM

EMILY YELLIN
  • Emily Yellin
Sometimes captioning goes wrong. Sometimes a line like, "Hotter than Memphis Asphalt," becomes, "Hotter than Memphis Ass Farm." Okay, that only happened once, on an episode of Sun Records. Of course the Internet caught it right away. Thanks Internet

Friday, January 6, 2017

Pooping With WMC's Andy Wise

Posted By on Fri, Jan 6, 2017 at 1:09 PM

Look how they follow you.
  • Look how they follow you.
WMC consumer investigator Andy Wise is many things — a survivor; a humanitarian; and a Christian martyr.  In addition to all of that, he's also an office pooper who knows how to deliver the "ew."

At least, in another tweet, Mr. "On your side," finally answered a question I've been asking for a long time — What kind of crime won't WMC over-report and sensationalize? Unless, you know, he IS the Riddler...

via GIPHY


Thursday, January 5, 2017

The Strange Case of Marsha Blackburn and the Exploding Cigar

Posted By on Thu, Jan 5, 2017 at 1:54 PM

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Evil scientist Marsha Blackburn lit up a fat cat Twitter cigar yesterday and BAM! Right in the face.

Obviously, it's not hard to troll online polls and Democrats are motivated. But, as previously uninsured folks stare down the very real chance of losing their recently insured status, it's hard to say the soot and tobacco all over Blackburn's pinched, bitter face is completely devoid of meaning.

How can it be that Republicans, after opposing the Affordable Care Act tooth and nail for six years, haven't got an alternative? I mean, aside from the obvious fact that none of them care if Uncle Phil gets his medicine or not because he should have worked harder when he was healthy. Duh.

It's because Obamacare was the workable Republican plan, they only hated it because — Obama. And no matter how hard the kleptocracy scrambles, they can't come up with something just as conflicted and industry forward that looks completely different to consumers who'll experience zero value from less Medicaid or potentially disastrous tort reform.

So, as the great unraveling gets underway, let's all have a good laugh at Marsha's exploding cigar. It'll be her turn to laugh when we're all crawling with something expensive and incurable.

Friday, December 2, 2016

Tony Allen's Big D Beats Stiff Competition

Posted By on Fri, Dec 2, 2016 at 11:39 AM

via GIPHY

Sometimes tweets have two meanings.
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Monday, November 21, 2016

A Useful GIF of Andy Wise Saying, "We're Here."

Posted By on Mon, Nov 21, 2016 at 1:02 PM

WMC's consumer investigator Andy Wise got an IKEA preview last week. Wise previewed that preview by tweeting this GIF, which really deserves an afterlife. Share it Memphis. Use it well.
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Tuesday, November 15, 2016

"KKK More American than Obama" — Deputy Director of Finance for Shelby County Corrections.

Posted By on Tue, Nov 15, 2016 at 10:52 AM

Phones are buzzing in the halls of Shelby Co. government this morning because of a Facebook post shared by David Barber, Deputy Director of Finance for the Shelby County Department of Corrections. According to the accompanying status, the KKK is more American than two-term US president Barack Obama. Get ready, this story's just starting to crank up, and will probably be everywhere, shortly.

Here's the offending post from Nov. 7.
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Also, this.

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And, in case you're wondering who the guy is, it's all in his profile. 
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UPDATE: David Barber has resigned.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Commercial Appeal Declared a "Legend" Following Story About Frat Bro's Date with a Porn Star

Posted By on Wed, Feb 24, 2016 at 1:22 PM

For maximum enjoyment press play on this video before reading. 


It's not the stuff of a Pulitzer Prize winning series, but a digital report on the Commercial Appeal's website is receiving attention across social media for recounting the epic tale of UT Knoxville student and Sigma Chi frat brother Patrick Goswitz, who invited porn star Cherry Morgan to a formal dance this weekend. 

This is what a legendary legend looks like.
  • This is what a legendary legend looks like.

"UT fraternity brother declared ‘a legend’ for date with porn star," was originally published by the Knoxville News Sentinel and tells the touching story of young Goswitz who was, in fact, described as a "legend," as a result of his date with Morgan, the Knoxville-based actress famous for appearing in adult films where, like many porn stars, she gives blowjobs to plumbers, pizza guys and other dudes who deliver.  (WARNING: LINK VERY NSFW).

"Goswitz told [Dan] Regester [of the website Total Frat Move] via an Instagram interview uploaded on TFM that he had invited Morgan to the formal via a message on Facebook and she sent him "her digits" and accepted."

The saga of Goswitz and Morgan is told using quotes from blogs and social media and is most notable for containing the worst sentence in the history of print journalism: "Goswitz told [Dan] Regester [of the website Total Frat Move] via an Instagram interview uploaded on TFM that he had invited Morgan to the formal via a message on Facebook and she sent him "her digits" and accepted."

As it happens, people with internet connections and Google alerts for Cherry Morgan had many newsworthy things  to say about the hot date. One person wrote, "Atta boy." Another said, "Lucky guy!" A third anonymous commenter wrote "Good for him," while a somewhat sadder post read, "I would consider myself legendary to even bring a girl to meet my family."

This is easily the greatest thing the CA has published since yesterday's breaking story about how how nicotine makes it hard to quit smoking. 

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Friday, May 22, 2015

You know what's better than the new Tennessee logo? Brian Kelsey's mirror selfie.

Posted By on Fri, May 22, 2015 at 9:15 AM

Reflections of Brian Kelsey
  • Reflections of Brian Kelsey

It's getting weird out there, people. Rise to the occasion and make #Kelfie trend. Like the man says, it's for a good cause.

The New Tennessee Logo Has Its Own Parody Twitter Account, Of Course...

Posted By on Fri, May 22, 2015 at 8:12 AM

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You know, there's really no reason to say much about this. Something happened yesterday resulting in an outpouring of "OMG" and "smh." Boom. Twitter account. Enjoy. 

Oh, also, @TnLogo, you should totally follow Captain America. 

Monday, April 27, 2015

Smoked Meats: Memphis' Crack for Lunch Meat Story Gets the WTFark Treatment

Posted By on Mon, Apr 27, 2015 at 10:19 PM

"Hey, you look like the kind of guy who might trade $50,000 worth of lunch meat for some crack cocaine."
  • "Hey, you look like the kind of guy who might trade $50,000 worth of lunch meat for some crack cocaine."

Last week Memphis Flyer reporter Toby Sells told the gripping tale of Larry Ron Bowen, the Arkansas truck driver who traded a tractor trailer load of lunch meat for an undisclosed amount of crack cocaine. The story was picked by various other national and international news outlets, but nobody told it better than the satirical online news content generator WTFark.

Enjoy. 


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Wednesday, January 7, 2015

One of the more disturbing images you'll see this week.

Posted By on Wed, Jan 7, 2015 at 5:00 PM

Who's the real lefty?
  • Who's the real lefty?

I know exactly what you're thinking: Man, it sure would be nice if there was someplace on the internet where I could spend hours and hours pouring over the written words of a liberal-hating climate change denier while looking at a picture of the author flying past planets and stars clutching his big Christian-American space-penis.

What, you weren't thinking that? Too bad, because here's a link to Tommy V Talks, the online home of one of Memphis' more outspoken accordion players. 

In this fascinating post Tommy V puts the smackdown on Neil deGrasse Tyson: 

Go ahead charlatan believers of global climate change; behold how that over a few days, with one simple blow of God’s nostrils the water level in Lake Meade has risen dramatically to levels not seen in many years; and the forecast is for even more precipitation out West.


Yeah! Eat God-snot Neil!

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

WREG Tweets Porn, Internet Responds

Posted By on Tue, Oct 7, 2014 at 11:04 AM


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This morning WREG was "hacked," which, we think means some poor hack at WREG accidentally tweeted a weather promotion with a porn link attached. Of course the Twitterverse couldn't let something this momentous pass without a spectacular spanking. Here are some of Fly on the Wall's favorite #rockbone responses so far.

We've all been there.
  • We've all been there.

You can take the boy out of 460 Tennessee St. But you can't take 460 Tennessee St. out of the boy
  • You can take the boy out of 460 Tennessee St. But you can't take 460 Tennessee St. out of the boy

Radar envy?
  • Radar envy?

Of course you knew there had to be a band called Rock Bone, right? "GRAB THE BONE!"

Wendi's right. Well played with. #rockbone
  • Wendi's right. Well played with. #rockbone



ALSO A BIG FAN OF THAT SONG "ROCKBONE LIKE A HURRICANE."
  • Also a big fan of that song "Rockbone Like a Hurricane."



Nailed it!
  • Nailed it!


The city needs a new slogan.
  • The city needs a new slogan.

#Rockbone as Fuck!
  • #Rockbone as Fuck!

You're so Memphis.
  • You're so Memphis.
BOOM!
  • BOOM!

If we've missed something especially awesome, please share in comments. And Happy Tuesday! #rockbone

UPDATE: Of course this is exactly the sort of thing that gets picked up by Mashable, who've brought new information to the table. Pornhub at least attempted to begin a dialogue with WREG. Sweet. #Rockbone #PornhubKatie
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Friday, August 15, 2014

You Can Own the Key to the City of Memphis Presented to Phyllis Diller by Mayor W.W. Herenton

Posted By on Fri, Aug 15, 2014 at 3:08 PM

But you've got to act fast because, at posting time, there's only six hours left before the auction ends.

That's right. You can own a key to the city of Memphis.

Also cranks most Buicks
  • Also cranks most Buicks

And not just any key, but the one presented to Phyllis Diller by Willie Herenton. The Phyllis Diller. The Willie Herenton.

HAAAAAAAAA! -- Phyllis Diller
  • "HAAAAAAAAA!" — Phyllis Diller

Sorry, this next photo isn't actually the key that's for sale which may or may not come with a case. It's another key given to someone else at around the same time. But really, you've got to see this elegant ignition tickler as it was intended to be seen. No ribbons. No frills. Just one helluva damn key.

Hot
  • Hot


Also contained in this lot: a certificate of honorary citizenship of Shelby Co. presented to Diller. It's dated 1988, a few years before Herenton took office, so it's probably not related to the key in any way.

The Memphis Key is currently going for $81. That's $7 more than Diller's keys to Cheasaning, MI, and Havre De Grace, MD.

Memphis is #1 (when it comes to Keys to the City presented to Phyllis Diller)
  • Memphis is #1 (when it comes to Keys to the City presented to Phyllis Diller)

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Awkward Reporter Photos: WREG's Melissa Moon poses with Superman, Batman, and the Amazing Spider-Man who's "Going Commando"

Posted By on Sat, May 10, 2014 at 9:53 AM

WREG reporter Melissa Moon tweeted this shot from a charity 5-k.

Spectacular.

Is that a web shooter in your tights or are you just happy to see me?
  • Is that a web shooter in your tights or are you just happy to see me?

Also of note, Batwood.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Memphis City Council: The Movie

Posted By on Wed, Feb 12, 2014 at 11:32 AM

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If you were going to make a movie about Memphis' City Council who would you cast? Signature Advertising has created this amusing time-waster, if you're in the mood to waste some time.

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