The Bride!

Everything that’s good and bad about The Bride! can be seen in its central character. Ida (Jessie Buckley) is a classic gun moll straight out of a Depression era gangster picture. Alongside the champagne cocktails, furs, and jewels, she’s also privy to a lot of the violence her thuggish boyfriends commit as a matter of course. When she gets a little too lit and mouths off about  Lupino (Zlatko Burić), a powerful mob boss who gets his jollies killing working girls and tearing their tongues out, his goons throw her down the stairs — a common occupational hazard for gun molls. But then, things get weird. Ida’s body is dragged up by Dr. Euphronious (Annette Bening), who uses super science to bring her back to life. The reanimated Ida can’t remember much about who she was before “the accident,” but she quickly proves that she still has a mind of her own when it is revealed that the reason for her revivification is that she is to become the bride of Frankenstein. Or rather, Frankenstein’s monster, who now goes by Frank (Christian Bale.) 

So far, go good, right? But here’s the thing: The reason Ida mouthed off to mob boss who had her killed is because she was suddenly possessed by the restless spirit of Frankenstein author Mary Shelley (also Jessie Buckley) who continues to possess and torment the unfortunate moll even after she is revived. 

See what I mean? It’s one element too many. Not only do we have the classic Frankenstein theme of “scientists so preoccupied with whether or not they could they didn’t stop to think if they should” plus a feminist revenge fantasy, but we also have a ghost story and the metafictional aspect of an author becoming a character in the story they inspired. It’s just too many high concepts to shove into one movie. 

And yet! Without the possession element, we would not be treated to Jessie Buckley flipping effortlessly between a Chicago flapper accent and a rather posh English accent — often within a single sentence! Buckley is a generational virtuoso, and actor turned director Maggie Gyllenhaal understands what makes her fascinating to watch. 

At first, the revived Ida, who Frank renames Penelope, is not too keen on existing just to fulfill the carnal urges of a monster stitched together from cadavers. But eventually, she comes around to him. He’s considerate, a big movie fan, and can cut a rug. Plus, chicks dig scars. But their relationship doesn’t really take off until Frank kills a couple of would-be rapists who get handsy with Penelope while she’s dancing to Swedish electroclash phenom Fever Ray. (Like Streets of Fire, The Bride! can’t decide which decade it’s in.) They embark on a cross country reign of extremely fun terror, pursued by a couple of detectives (Penélope Cruz and Peter Sarsgaard), and inspiring a minor feminist revolution along the way. 

I was laughing all the way through The Bride! Sometimes, it wasn’t the good kind of laughter. But I’m not sure that this crew cares if you’re laughing with them or at them. The actors are all having the time of their lives, and their enthusiasm is infectious. Gyllenhaal had a unique vision, and she produces a gusher of startlingly beautiful images.  

The Bride! is all contradictions. Remaking Bride of Frankenstein, one of the greatest horror films ever made, is a big lift. Crossing it with Bonnie and Clyde, another classic, is certainly a choice. Gyllenhaal almost pulls it off. Or maybe she does pull it off. On page three of my notes, I wrote “train wreck”; on the last page, I wrote “glorious train wreck.” Is it a good movie? I don’t know. Is it entertaining? As hell!