Fly on the Wall 1408 

Weave violence and Bill Clinton

Hair Today...

It's like the old saying goes. Guns don't kill people, people kill people. With guns. To steal weaves, wigs, and hair extensions. Last Wednesday, two thieves wearing dark ski masks shot and killed the manager at Bundles of Hair on Millbranch. Bundles of Hair is a "virgin human hair" dealership, and instead of stealing money, the culprits drove off with a box of small, unmarked hairpieces.

The encounter is the latest in a series of deadly hair-related crimes. It comes only a month after 18-year-old Shelby Isaac shot and killed EJ Tate and his pregnant girlfriend Edwina Thomas. Tate ran the company, and bags of human hair valued at up to $200 each have been listed as a possible motive for the homicide. In a follow-up to TV reports about the Bundles of Hair shooting, Commercial Appeal reporter Yolanda Jones noted that thieves have stolen between $12,000 and $15,000 worth of fancy Brazilian weaves from Frayser wig store Beauty and Beyond in the past year. That just seems a lot of trouble and tragedy for something that's just going to end up tumbling down the sidewalk anyway.

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Fly on the Wall is calling for a moratorium on all descriptions of Bill Clinton as America's first black president since: a) it's always been a silly thing to say, and b) according to Clinton himself, that honor probably belongs to some other white guy, maybe even George Washington. From Clinton's recent visit to Memphis: "The other thing I want to make a funny comment about is Steve Cohen's remark that I was just a stand-in for the first black president. ... We learned that unless your ancestors, every one of you, are 100 percent from sub-Saharan Africa, we are all mixed-race people." The comment earned applause, so take that historical relevance!

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