Did anybody else catch an article in The Commercial Appeal with the headline, "Kirby High Cancels Thursday Classes Due to Pest Infestation?"
"Thursday marks the third consecutive day [Kirby] will be closed due to a 'pest infestation,'" the story began. Nearly 400 words later, the article concluded without ever getting around to saying what kind of pests might shut down a school.
Was it scary area protesters? Or die-hard John Leguizamo fans? No. As every other media outlet in town reported, it was rats!
"It's a real low felony ... It's presumptive diversion eligible, probation. Probably not do any jail time on it." — Memphis attorney Claiborne Ferguson explains "corpse abuse" to WMC news after a hospital security guard was caught having sex in the morgue. Tennessee has no laws against necrophilia. Ew.
A recent article by Robert Cassiday, editor of Building Design and Construction named Memphis as the city to watch in 2019 in an article asking, "Can this Mid-South city of 670,000 become the next Austin?"
It reminded Fly on the Wall of that time when Texas vendors were asked to cease and desist when Austin was trying to be the next Memphis.
To be fair, it was only a warning shot. And 71-year-old Tommy Smith did verbally warn the 7, 10, and 11 year-olds to keep off his property.