The Cheat Sheet 

A full-scale replica of the Niña, one of Christopher Columbus' ships that he used to "sail the ocean blue in 1492," docks in Memphis on its journey down the Mississippi to Baton Rouge. With so many reports today on Americans' growing ignorance of history, we just wanted to be clear: No, it's not the real one.

A man steals a truck in Tipton County but, during his getaway, falls asleep behind the wheel and plunges into a ditch. Police nab him a few miles away. And now he'll be able to get plenty of sleep in prison.

click to enlarge GREG CRAVENS

An alderman in Covington, Tennessee, wants to outlaw low-hanging jeans that expose the wearer's underwear and, in some cases, other private parts. "In my day," he tells reporters, "that would have been considered indecent exposure." But what does he plan to do about carpenters and plumbers who expose their "butt cleavage"?

Casting agents are in town looking for someone to play the role of Michael Oher, a young man who overcame neglect and abuse to eventually become a damn good football player for Ole Miss. It's an inspirational story, but filling the role might be just a tad difficult: The star needs to be about 6'-6" and weigh almost 300 pounds. Here's an idea: Since no acting experience is required and the applicant must be athletic, why don't they just ask Oher to play himself?

Collierville folks sure like the quiet. They've previously complained about trains blowing their horns, and now the city is offering shock collars to pooch owners whose dogs do what dogs often do — bark. Maybe the town just needs to hand out earplugs to everyone. Or Xanax.



Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment



We Saw You

Military Masquerade, Maciel's Highland, The Gray Canary

Hungry Memphis

Beer Bracket Challenge, Round 2


Tayari Jones Reading at the Orpheum

Hungry Memphis

Muddy's Bake Shop Turns 10

Tiger Blue

Tigers 91, #23 Houston 85

Intermission Impossible

Dead in the Water: New Moon's "Eurydice" is wet and wonderful

Politics Beat Blog

Alexander Touts Tax Bill, Offers Proposals on Guns and Immigration

News Blog

Memphis Pets of the Week


More by Michael Finger

  • Memphis' "Summer of Fear"

    Thirty-seven years ago this week, Memphis became a city in fear. In the late summer of 1969, a cold-blooded killer stalked the streets, and over a period of 28 days, police made one grisly discovery after another. In the end, the slayer was captured after a wild chase by a posse of ordinary citizens. After his arrest, George Howard Putt told reporters, “I’d do it all again.” The murder spree began on the afternoon of August 14, 1969 ...
    • Mar 16, 2016
  • Mr. Bingle to Appear at Potters Guild Show

    • Nov 20, 2014
  • Book Notes

    • Oct 20, 2011
  • More »

Readers also liked…

© 1996-2018

Contemporary Media
460 Tennessee Street, 2nd Floor | Memphis, TN 38103
Visit our other sites: Memphis Magazine | Memphis Parent | Inside Memphis Business
Powered by Foundation