The Mullet Code
by John Branston
You see, Code star Tom Hanks sports the "Camaro Crash Helmet" in the movie, and it's no accident! According to an article in The San Francisco Chronicle, Hanks' hideous hairiness is all part of a conspiracy by the Catholic Church. Think about it: Jesus wore one.
Here’s writer Peter Hartlaub’s theory: "Where do a lot of people with mullets end up? In prison. What was the only movie where Hanks played a prison guard? The Green Mile. Who did Hanks' Green Mile co-star Michael Jeter play in Sister Act II: Back in the Habit? Father Ignatius. And who, ultimately, gave Father Ignatius his orders? The Vatican.
"Could it be clearer what is behind this?" Hartlaub continues. "The Vatican, after hiding for centuries the true story that Jesus had a mullet, conspired with hundreds of celebrities in the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s to make the haircut popular so they could reveal the truth."
Scary stuff. Read more here. And to see the bizarre lengths to which this plot extends, go here.
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