Police Report

Murphy the ape statue was an โ€œiconโ€ at Design Emporium and Antiques in Kensington, Maryland โ€” until he was stolen in the wee hours of Jan. 4, the New York Post reported. Murphy, made of cast iron and weighing 200 pounds, was hurriedly loaded into the bed of an โ€œolder model Chevrolet Colorado Z71,โ€ authorities said, as seen on a surveillance video. The suspect โ€œpulled right up and had the bolt cutters readyโ€ to cut the cable securing the sculpture. Shop owner Kristina Jamgochian said people would take selfies with Murphy. โ€œItโ€™s my business and I feel violated,โ€ she said. A $10,000 reward awaits anyone who helps recover the gorilla. [New York Post, 1/31/2023]

Oops!

A 66-year-old female patient at the Glen Oaks Alzheimerโ€™s Special Care Center in Urbandale, Iowa, had suffered a slow decline and was moved into hospice care in late December. On Jan. 3, CBS News reported, the woman was pronounced dead, and the funeral home was called. She was placed in a body bag and transported to the Ankeny Funeral Home & Crematory, where workers unzipped the bag and got a shock: They โ€œobserved [the residentโ€™s] chest moving and she gasped for air,โ€ a report from the Iowa Department of Inspections and Appeals detailed. Responding EMS workers were able to get a pulse and monitor breathing, but she had no eye movement or verbal response. She was returned to the care facility, where she died two days later with her family at her side. The home is facing $10,000 in fines. [CBS News, 2/2/2023]

New York City recently unveiled the Long Island Railroadโ€™s new Grand Central Madison terminal, which was built to the tune of $11 billion. But, NBC New York reported on Feb. 1, the new facility is marred by a spelling mistake โ€” etched in stone. A carved quote from artist Georgia Oโ€™Keeffe sports a misspelling of her name, with only one F. โ€œWe clearly F-ed this one up and itโ€™s being fixed,โ€ said MTA communications director Tim Minton. However, he couldnโ€™t say when the edit would be complete. [NBC New York, 2/1/2023]

Wait, What?

A couple in Etobicoke, Toronto, left on an extended business trip in January 2022, CTV News reported. When they returned home months later, they were stunned to realize that their house had been sold and the new owners had moved in. Police said a man and woman impersonated the owners, hired a real estate agent, and listed the property using fake identification. Police are still looking for the imposters. [CTV News, 1/5/2023]

That Rule Doesnโ€™t Apply to Me

On Jan. 16, Brazilian attorney Leandro Mathias de Novaes delivered his mother to the Laboratรณrio Cura in Sao Paulo, where she was scheduled for an MRI. Before they both entered the MRI room, the New York Post reported, they were asked to remove any metal objects from their persons and signed a form detailing the protocols, but Novaes opted to not remove, or disclose, his concealed weapon. When the MRIโ€™s magnetic field yanked the pistol from his waistband, it fired and struck him in the stomach; he was hospitalized for three weeks after the incident but died on Feb. 6. [New York Post, 2/9/2023]

Clothing Optional

Trevyn Wayne Hill, 21, of Las Vegas, let it all hang out on Jan. 28 when he approached another guest in a stairwell at the Des Moines (Iowa) Downtown Marriott, KCCI-TV reported. Court documents said Hill was naked and brandishing a toilet plunger when he yelled, โ€œIโ€™m going to [expletive] get you,โ€ while chasing the other person. Hill cruised around the hotel in his birthday suit, destroying a sprinkler system and pulling several fire alarms before finally being subdued by firefighters. Hill pleaded not guilty to assault, first-degree criminal mischief, and disorderly conduct. [KCCI, 2/3/2023]

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