Let out your nerd rage. (Photo: Courtesy Memphis Armored Fight Club | Facebook)

Where, oh where, is your knight in shining armor? Are they riding on a white horse, ready to slay a dragon? Climbing up your long rope of hair hanging from your tower window? Sitting at a round table to plan out a quest to find the Holy Grail? Or are they in Memphis? Knights are, after all, running amok around here, thanks to the Memphis Armored Fight Club.ย 

Rusty Wagner is one such knight, having joined the club in 2018 after seeing a duel at a Renaissance fair in Millington. โ€œLike most little boys, I wanted to be a knight,โ€ he says. โ€œIโ€™m an older guy now, but I get a lot of enjoyment out of it. Itโ€™s all kinds of fun.โ€ The group fights in the style of 14th- and 15th-century European combat with real steel weapons and real-deal armor. For Wagner, his armor weighs 65 pounds and is based on the 14th-century English man-of-war suit. โ€œItโ€™s plain-Jane,โ€ he says, but even โ€œplain-Janeโ€ armor can cost a pretty penny โ€” about $1,800. After all, itโ€™s custom-made and shipped all the way from Ukraine.ย 

And, sure, thereโ€™s a bit of danger using all that heavy material and sharp metal, but thatโ€™s what the armor is for. โ€œThe first time you strap on your armor, youโ€™re scared but also excited,โ€ Wagner says. โ€œThe first time you get hit and donโ€™t die, itโ€™s thrilling. Itโ€™s like that wasnโ€™t all that bad.โ€ย 

The group duels with swords and shields, long swords and bucklers, and pole arms. The rules are you can hit but you canโ€™t stab โ€” stabbing, well, thatโ€™s a bad, potentially lethal, idea and doesnโ€™t quite fit in with the โ€œfriendly competitionโ€ of their tournaments. Still, thereโ€™s catharsis in the fighting. โ€œYou get frustration out,โ€ Wagner says. โ€œWe call it nerd rage.โ€

If you donโ€™t believe him, for $5, you can try it yourself between matches at the clubโ€™s next tournament at the Black Lodge this Saturday. Of course, youโ€™ll strap on some soft armor, not the stuff that weighs 65 pounds, and, for 90 seconds in the ring, you can fight your friends, family members, lovers, or even members of the club if you so dare. All ages can participate. โ€œYou donโ€™t think 90 seconds is long till youโ€™re in the ring,โ€ Wagner says. โ€œEven if youโ€™re in a soft kit, itโ€™ll take the gas out of you.โ€

In between duels, the Lodge will also screen Excalibur and will offer a special menu of roasted chicken or rabbit with roasted potatoes and seasonal veggies, along with mead as a drink special.

And if you fall in love with armored fighting the way Wagner has, the club is always looking for new members. โ€œItโ€™s exciting to see the fighting itself, and itโ€™s even more exciting when you do it yourself,โ€ he says. Keep up with the group on Facebook or Instagram.ย 

Memphis Armored Fight Club, Black Lodge, Saturday, March 11, 6:30-9:30 p.m., $5/cover.